To the pleasantly plump man in the red outfit
Dear Santa,

I haven't been a particularly good kid this year. There's always room for improvement and as the positive force that you are, I assume that you'll have to 'believe' in me. It's called faith sir and there's a down payment involved to encourage my 'good' behavior. Though my name most likely resides on your naughty list, I'm still going to demand a present from you. What I require is this particular wall piece, TURBO wall art, by Mario Marsicano and Chris Lenox. It's limited to only 10 pieces so I suggest you drop those milk and cookies, get off your fat ass and order one quick. You don't want me to stop believing in you do you?

Kind Regards,
At 8:47 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

dear santa,
my friend darren thinks he's been good this year. please do him a favor, and spare him the embarassment by NOT giving him that ugly piece of junk that should be melted and turned into a REAL car. believe him, or not, is your choice- if you must, please give him a lead pipe to hang up instead. if you're feeling extra generous, please give this poor misguided soul some good taste.
thanks, and keep up the hard work.

At 10:24 PM, Blogger DC said...

If Jammer actually read my letter, I stated I 'WASN'T' a good kid this year.

I bet if that piece had a BMW logo or Apple logo, she would be ALL over it!

At 7:18 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

how lucky for me, bmw and apple don't stick their logo on crap. stooooopid.

At 12:57 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Dear Santa,
[J] forgot that BMW does put it's logo on crap, it's called the X3. Now all I ask this year is that she doesn't decapitate me for saying that. Thanks!


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